I was NEVER the faster cycle courier in london, I had several controllers whose opinion I respected tell me I could do the job well and quickly, but I was nowhere near the quickest on circuit.
The second time I went on the road, I never quite managed to get back to the same level I’d been at before.I guess that was for a mixture of reasons? Fear and caution (it is a fucking dangerous job and by this time I was already a father), mental state (I was not sleeping well and always felt guilty for going back, that I should get a ‘proper job’*) and maybe a little bit of laziness (I could never quiet get the fitness back or motivate myself as I once could). The industry had also shrunk in the year or so I had been mostly on the other end of the phone, but there where nearly as many messengers out there, if not more at some companies. Occasionally I liked to surprise my controllers at Creative with the odd burst of speed but I think we all knew I was a little burnt out.
However I was lucky enough to work with and know some of the fastest riders in the whole industry, not just London, but in some cases Europe and the World. This has already been covered by Moving Target, in much better words, and my opinions on the subject are out of date and biased, but they might still interest some people?
The Boys
I’m not sure who is the fastest rider now or who really was when I was riding, so I’ve just posted some tributes to who I felt were the quickest riders when I was out there and where people I’d eventually of written about anyway, so I thought it was best to get it out the way early. They’re not really in order, but I guess there might be some subconsciousness to the order I’ve posted them? Several of these riders achieved veteran status as messengers (they put in at least 10 years on the road). Photos stolen from Roxy, Selim and Moving Target.
Jos ‘Da Boss’
Jos was appeared on circuit, clad in lyrca (even skinsuits sometimes) and riding a fancier bike than even the flashest of us. It was a bit of a shock to the rest of us on the west ends (then) favourite stand-by spot ‘the steps’, but it soon turned out that he was actually really friendly and relaxed. In his youth he had been one of the top juniors in the Netherlands, but then he discovered messengering, which was fun than trying to make it as a pro. You could drink, smoke and you still got paid some pretty decent money to ride a bike. Jos was one of the most succesful London riders in both terms of messenger and ‘serious’ racing ever. He began riding brakeless at one stage, despite believing it to be slower, after he was accused of cheating when he won the fixed gear category at the Hellsinki ECMC. Not because he wanted to look cooler, but so he could beat them all again next time and no one would question it. It wasn’t arrogance, but good sportsmanship- he wanted it to be a fair playing field, on even terms. After he retired he started Tour d’ville, which unfoutunately shut down last year… gotta find out what he’s up to now.
Donny
Donny won around 12 (I’ve forgotten the exact figure) Alleycats in London. I don’t think anyone else has won that many? In those terms, if nothing else he was the best. He was huge, around 6’4, and carried a lot more muscle than your average rider. He’d been a semi pro oz rules footballer if I remember rightly from what Walshy (rider/partner at Scream Couriers)? Donny was not thought to be too friendly to those that didn’t know him, but that’s only cos he was so focussed on the job, that often look he’d straight through you. Anyone that took the time to speak to him when he was off the bike, understood he was just in ‘the zone’ once his feet hit the pedals. Now a Firefighter, back in Oz.
Josh
Josh, like Jos was also a serious bike racer before he became a messenger for much the same reasons. In fact there are quite a few parrells in their messenger/ cycling lives. Both were gifted athletes, both worked at Cyclone and Metro and both were amongst the most successful messengers in London in terms of results in town and internationally. Jos might have had the edge on him in terms of speed, but Josh was the better messenger. He also had a running rivalry in the alleycats with Donny and others, those of us who were actually into our road racing history commenting that he had achieved a sort of Raymond Poulidor reputation of being ‘the eternal second’. Which wasn’t true, because he won a lot. A quite, modest, honest, he made it past the veteran ten winters and finally retired his radio to become a tree surgeon. Another fucking dangerous way of making money.
Marco
Marco helped me out very, very early in my career, when like a muppet I was struggling with a puncture. Guess those Armadillos had finally worn through? I later worked with him at city sprint. Very occasionally Marco would fit a brake, but it would never last long (I remember he turning up after a bad crash, then taking the brake off because he was riding ‘too dangerous man, too fast, I keep getting myself into dangerous situations’). He was the fastest brakeless rider in London, in alleycats and on the circuit. If I remember right, he only ever won, one alleycat, but he was always placing in the top 3 and almost always the first brakeless rider. A fucking gent, always reliable and always friendly. Eventually returned to Italy to work for his Mama’s photography business again.
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Shane
Shane never raced an alleycat in london, or did a roller race to my knowledge. I don’t think he really cared about being the fastest in terms of the bragging rights of winning events. He just loved to ride. Really, fucking, fast. Having worked in the Creative office, I actually got to witness the sheer amount of money he was making. Of course he was making A LOT OF MONEY. Of course he was being ‘fed’ to some extent. But he was also one of the most experienced riders in London and could hold his own against and even beat most of the most successful riders (in terms of alleycat, championship and rollerrace results) day in and day out on circuit. Shane didn’t smoke or drink (but had previously been one of the biggest drunks on circuit and was on personal terms with Shane MacGowan- I shit you not, they shared the same local), ate well and when it was busy worked harder than almost anyone else in london. He was a veteran of both London and Dublin and was known in both towns to have been amongst the top riders on circuit. Eventually the lack of work in the industry started to bore him and he rode off to Italy to become a farmhand on an organic farm.
‘Janky’ James
Another of those faces that just appear in town, Janky came to europe for London Calling 07 and the Dublin CMWC. He ended up meeting a girl and coming back to London to work and live. Janky has a pretty modest, self-effacing sense of humour. He’s a born athlete, a good mechanic and a great messenger. Of course he wouldn’t admit to any of these things. He’s never taken racing as seriously as he could, but managed to win a 4th cat race and automatic promotion to 3rd Cat licence in his first ‘proper’ race in the uk. He turned up on a 20-year-old specialized with downtube shifters, a hangover, and a helmet and various bits of equipment he’d borrowed from me and others. I don’t think he even stripped down to he lyrca for the race and he sure as hell didn’t shave his legs. Being Janky, he won. Being Janky, he will always put that and any other success down to sheer luck. Janky has pulled in his fair share of messengering wins, including a hat-trick of wins in the Rollapuluza Donkey Derby. As far as I’m aware he’s probably currently the fastest rider on circuit. But then what do I know, I haven’t been out there for nearly 2 years?
Seamus
Seamus loves life. He loves hard work. He loves bikes. He loves beer. He loves punk rock and metal. He loves Celtic. He’s a veteran of well over 12 winters. He’s been at city sprint since before it was city sprint and consistently been one of the top earners in london for over ten years, which is one of the reasons he made my list (he has also one at least one alleycat). He’s also strong as an ox and as quick verbally and his is on the bike. He also happens to be one of my best mates, follow the same football team and has lived with both me and my significant ex, so that’s another reason he made it in. I told you I was biased.
The Girls
I’m gonna cop-out here a little and say I’m gonna come back to this, but there where some girls out there such as Crisima, Therese, Sarah, Chandra, Serina, Stinky Nic, Coco and more, who could and can still hold it against the boys. However like I said I’m gonna give them their own post, otherwise this one will just run and run.
The Honourable mentions
There are a lot of people who should be in the list above, who were on circuit at the same time a me. But there isn’t room for them all. Wingnut, Bobby, Chris/ the professor/ camp freddy, Alex, Ricky, Jakob, Nanu Nanu, Lima… So many others. A lot of the Metro riders were devastatingly fast (you either got a job there cos you were scarily fast, one of the most professional messengers in town, or if like me you kept turning up for years asking for a couple of days and then got REALLY lucky), but then on the money you could earn there when it was good you had to ride hard. A lot of the Polish riders where really fucking fast (particularly The European Monkey, Kuba, Urban, Wookie, Nobby Stiles… shit.. I think polish messengers in london will probably get their own post eventually). Lots of riders at City Sprint, Lewis Day, Creative, Reuters Cyclone. A lot of people should be on my list above, in fact I’ll probably end up editing the above and adding someone in sooner or latter. But if you were/are fast, then you know it and it’s not about the kudos, prizes or ego. It’s about doing the job the best you can.
*Yes I know it is a proper job, despite what the outside world thinks.
